One
flower---three states of mind
---Sunil
Sharma
---Venkat
presented her a fresh rose, while walking on the road in a wet Toronto---the
rains were sudden, fresh, with the scents of young spring typical of the city,
so different from earlier locations in South Asia---an almost unpremeditated
gesture, or, maybe, the influence of
social media on a young psyche, eager to express the notion of romance,
and, find love, true love, in a stranger or almost-stranger, the only common
thread a shared ethnicity and quest for better existence, in a strange place
and culture that was subtly colour-coded but overall welcoming for the foreign
workers who worked for lesser dollars and never complained, eager to settle in
and find some dignity there.
All
these things were working at some subterranean level of an active brain, when,
eager to express his feelings for her, he did what was supposed to be done by
the males in this game of courtship with no fixed rules.
He
bent down, said a “hi!” and offered the rose, as a gift universally understood
as a symbol of love.
She
was surprised to see this figure, comical in effect.
A
man bent down on his right knee, indifferent to the drizzle and the thin crowd
on a working morning of the spring of 2019.
The
blasé scene, repeated ad nauseam, however, produced a different reaction within
a female heart engaged in an identical quest for a stable marital home.
She
went weak, almost fainted in his arms, overjoyed by this sudden development of
a strange story searching for a denouement in a foreign setting. They sealed
the three-day affair with a hot kiss---and applause from the smiling people.
The two immigrants kissing became a trending video on the internet and burned
it for a few hours.
He
adored the flower, a lucky mascot.
---He
hated roses after she left him in a huff and crushing the rose that he
had come to present to her daily, in their rented apartment, overlooking the
harbor.
The
romance ended as swiftly as it had begun, leaving him confused. He did not even
look at the Afghan man selling the roses for few days, avoiding the tall
strapping man with turban and khol in
the eyes; a stranger who had almost become a pal in that city of a million
common dreams; an unlikely comrade-cum-counsellor, sharing stories of broken
guys, in search of meaningful and enduring love and stable homes, away from
their homelands burning with so many inequalities and raging violence against
perceived enemies of every type other than their own tribes. Afterwards, they
both exchanged stories that were typically a strong blend of hope and sadness,
joy and pain, loss and recovery---endless cycle called life across ages.
He
had burnt out every last trace of that enigmatic woman that had accepted his flower
on a wet street, in a time-slot that looked like a black hole now, in the
muddled chronology of time.
His
active mind--- battered by deadlines and profit-pursuits over the weekdays and
nights in a dismal pad in a shared apartment, downtown, wanted to erase that
toothy smile and brown cheeks rouged to a lush pink and false eyebrows and loud
laughter on trifles and the pouts in public places, as some kind of assumed or
culturally-imposed sexiness on her petite figure---yes, it wanted to erase all
those links, traces, memories by pressing on the delete button, some deep side
of the active brain of a man on PR---and it did and he breathed easy, plunging
into more assignments and a second part-time job in a warehouse run by some
Bangladeshis, near Brampton.
Finally,
Venkat could erase her and moved on, never buying the flowers from that Afghan
but stopping by sometimes to chat and know his side of reality.
In
fact, he was in denial about his own human status, denial about suppressed
emotions that turn a zombie into a man, a robot into a thinking, bipedal being.
Love!
A doomed emotion found in Hollywood, not in real-time life of middle-class
dreaming an American dream across the world---same aspirations and colours in a
colourless, powerless existence as one of the sidetracked 99percenters or some
category where professionals got pigeon-holed like that.
He
wanted to remain focused on success.
Only
a few poets could understand that hazy region of female anatomy, beyond the
logic of the day.
He
hated: Love. Women. Roses.
And
romantic films as fictions.
A
relic.
It
comes cheap in a mass culture where it can be bought for a few dollars.
Tales
of unequal power and control: night-stand with a hooker, owning a battered
body, for few hours in a cheap motel or drunken orgies some place---forgotten
next morning.
They
had forgotten for the original search for the soul of a body that would be
interlinked with another in a long journey onwards.
Love
that would neutralize all the horded anger, acidity and bitterness and heal the
festering inner scars.
“True
love will find you once again, Mr. Bitter,” an ad-hoc GF had told a weeping
him---bit aged, frayed on the sides and insides, plumper and receding hair---on
the lakeshore, one of those cold October nights, peculiar to Canada, adding
mystery to one of the banal sexual encounters, empty shells on the beach.
He
had nodded eagerly for such a magical scenario in an existence---lonely and
absurd!
“Illogical
love finds home,” she said. “Restores faith and sanity in the market!”
---Later,
it did happen.
He ran into a Vietnamese girl selling a
painting of a bleeding rose. He bought the painting---and her heart
incrementally, after long discussions on art and flowers in a consumerist
culture---presented her a rose, similar style, and she beamed and cried and then
both cried happily---and soon got married.
The
prophecy came true!
He
adored roses!
Sunil Sharma, PhD (English), is a Toronto-based academic, critic, literary editor and author with 23 published books: Seven collections of poetry; four of short fiction; one novel; a critical study of the novel, and, nine joint anthologies on prose, poetry and criticism, and, one joint poetry collection. He is, among others, a recipient of the UK-based Destiny Poets’ inaugural Poet of the Year award---2012. His poems were published in the prestigious UN project: Happiness: The Delight-Tree: An Anthology of Contemporary International Poetry, in the year 2015.
--- http://www.drsunilsharma.blogspot.in/
Hahhha..loved this .. :) the rose the romance and the aftermath ..
ReplyDeleteThanks for your kind words.
DeleteI loved this..the two roses the romance and the aftermath ... The setting..
ReplyDeleteLovely as usual !
ReplyDeleteThanks for encouragement!
DeleteThis is just exquisite. I love how you so boldly say the quiet parts loudly, courageous and brazen yet, with such an endearing sense of humor and whimsy also, never letting the bastards grind the protagonist down. Another important contribution to the literature of migration and wayfaring speaking learnedly to this convoluted age of ours, where wonder and pain commingle inextricably. You’ve truly made the rain your season/weather pattern, taken impressive command of in different work! Reminiscent of some of my favorite French New Wave or Italian Neorealist love affair pictures, yet fascinatingly accusatory of the core mendacity of the genre itself simultaneously. The postscript/epilogue was just superb, so glad it was appended. Flash Fiction of the highest order!
ReplyDelete