Four Poems by Nolo Segundo

 

THE WINTER OF MY SOUL

 

The winter of my soul was in the spring called youth

when I danced and sang and played the fool,

when I could care for no one really, not even

for myself---

certainly not for the soul I could not see within,

nor could I see the souls of others….

 

That was the harshest winter, though snowless

and without a frigid air yet dead was the ground

I walked on, dead too was my heart as I moved

through the world like an orphan abandoned,

abandoned by hope and faith and love,

till Death itself smiled at me and called my name

and I went to it because I could not see my soul.

 

But in that utter darkness where death hides,

hides like a coward,

and in that pain beyond pain that death brings

to those who seek it,

I, like the blind man whom Christ gave sight to,

suddenly knew again my soul and as I called out

to God,

I began the hard long climb out of the pit towards

the forever Light….

 

Now I have lived through 200 seasons as birth

and death dance in their turn, and time I once

rode like a prince his horse now rides my back,

pushing me down bit by bit as the years pile up

like burnt logs that will never be lit again…

yet I am happy, not for old age with all its

myriad slights and insults, and not for that

unfinished part which I suppose is found in

every life, even the longest-- no, my happiness

is simpler, sweeter now that my world has

shrunk, for my soul has grown and as it grows,

becomes ever more hungry for the food of

Heaven….

 

 

STAYING IN THIS WORLD STARTS TO FEEL STRANGE…

 

Staying in this world starts to feel strange

when you’ve pushed past 3 score and ten,

each year going by with increasing speed

or so it seems as time itself starts looking

a bit unreal, more imagination than substance.

 

You can’t help but think, wonder actually,

what might come next—you know it’s not

extinction, cessation, extermination, ending,

...a quenching of the life force...of you.

 

You’ve known for 2/3 of a rather long life

that something comes next, after the body

you will no longer need is buried or burnt.

You know it will be some world, but you

cannot say which world your soul will

make a new home in—but if you are right

about the God you love, then love will be

waiting for you….

 

 

AN OLD MAN SEES HIS BRAIN

 

The doctor put the disc

into the side of the computer

so the old man could see

the MRI of his old brain.

 

She gently, almost lyrically

pointed to its dark spaces,

so he could see how time

shrinks all life, even the brain.

 

But the old man smiled,

and said to the young doctor

[who was but half his age],

‘It’s a funny thing, Doc, 

how only in old age have

I become a poet, and

a published one at that!

 

My brain is lessening,

shrinking, while my mind

is ever growing--

reaching into spaces

both small and vast,

ever seeking,

ever wondering,

ever rhapsodizing

the world….’

The Cybernetic Lullaby                                    

Part I

 

They sing softly to us at

Every click of the mouse—

use me, I'm here for you,

only you, in the entire

universe will I serve….

 

And we lay enraptured

as they bring us the world,

knowledge the wise men

of history never had, and

ease, lots of ease to save

us time and trouble. Soon

we cannot live without them,

the thought of it too mean.

Without them we would loose

Touch with our friends, jobs,

Even our money might wander

If we cannot watch it daily.

 

However did our ancestors

Survive without an iPhone?

 

Part II

 

I read on my laptop today—

Automation is making us dumber,

Ineffective, even maybe impotent.

Perhaps it's a conspiracy by that secret

Society, the computer brotherhood.

(Do you really believe your Apple is

Innocent and IBM is not plotting?)

 

Or maybe we should just blame

Human sloth, that siren call of

Sheer damn laziness which can

Lure the best of us to a quiet doom.

 

A simple proof: hand a twenty to a clerk

And ask him to make change without

Looking to the machine for succour.

That blank, innocent look he gives you—

"Why me?",  he seems to be saying,

And you can't help but pity him a bit.

He is, after all, a victim of mass education.

 

There are worse victims:

Airliners wildly crashing,

Doctors killing their patients,

Nuclear power plants going

BOOM! And killing the land

For an eon or two, or three.

 

How like little children we were!

Thinking these machines would

Be our slaves, sans the brutality.

But it is we who are chained by

The zeros and ones, we who are

Thinking less, creating cheaper,

Settling into a cybernetic fog.

 

 

Part III: 

When Androids Dream

When we finally build them

(and it will not be long)

Will androids finally lead us

all to nirvana , a world of peace,

leisure, and endless wealth?

 

Could any hell be worse?

For that day will be when

We lose purpose, and soon

Perhaps the very will to live.

 

When the androids dream

( and they will dream,

because we will make them

to be like us, for we have

always been a vain species),

will they not dream of sky

and soaring free of the land,

free of the weak, sad humans

they serve without accordance?

 

Then, when these human face

Machines begin dreaming in

Daylight, they will see no need

For their progenitors, and those

Of us left living as shells sans

Struggle or pain or conflict, in

An existence so boring, will

Doubtless welcome our end.

 

 

Nolo Segundo, pen name of L.J.Carber, became a widely published poet in his mid-70's in over 170 literary journals/anthologies in America, Canada, England, Romania, Scotland, Portugal, Australia, Sweden, India, China, Hungary, Israel and Turkey. A trade publisher has released 3 book length collections: The Enormity of Existence [2020], Of Ether and Earth [2021], and Soul Songs [2022]. These titles like much of his work reflect the awareness he's had since having an NDE when as a 24 year old agnostic-materialist, believing only matter was real and so death meant extinction, he lept into a Vermont river in an attempt to end the suffering of a major clinical depression. He learned that day the utter reality that poets, Plato, and Jesus have spoken of for millennia: that every sentient human has a consciousness that predates birth and survives death--a soul. A retired teacher [America, Japan, Taiwan, and Cambodia in the mid-70's] he's been married 43 years to a smart and beautiful Taiwanese woman.