He Kneads Me
My chest is a rest
for a cat who’s a pest
and a comfort and hope
asking me to elope
to his fantasy dream
where his purring would seem
to drown out every fear,
wipe away every tear.
Climbing o’er my ab-domen
in order to roam in
my fullest attention
is his way to mention
that he needs my love,
then he’ll give me a shove
knowing that I can’t rest
while he’s kneading my chest.
This keeps me alert
but make holes in my shirt
which proceed through my skin
to the nerve cells within
and when he hits a nipple
it causes a ripple
of pain so alarming
he’s no longer charming!
To pull him away
would leave scars for a day,
but a quick spritz of water
reminds him he aughter
become a Cheshire,
disappearing in fear
because if he won’t stop
he’ll be hit by a drop!
Then he’ll ask, “May I climb
on my perch one more time?”
and in spite of my pain
he’ll remount and remain—
sometimes short, sometimes long,
while he purrs me a song,
for my belly and chest
is the nest he likes best.
Sleepwriting
Now and then some thoughts occur
which better judgment should deter
from writing—uninviting verse,
once written which may sound much worse
than sailors who would rhyme a curse.
Flowing smoothly through one’s head
while restlessly awake in bed
(as muses call within your dreams—
hydraulic pressures ripping seams),
thoughts stretch from pages into reams
and tell a tale, a narrative
that’s truly uncomparative
to epics from the days of yore
(not “days of yours” but long before)
with heroes, battles, love, and gore.
Nor do I mean incomparable;
these clearly are demonstrable
as adequate at best, or less,
and lack all hope of some success
(though sometimes published, nonetheless,
they’ll sadly cause undue duress
to friends who’d rather curse than bless
the author who caused such distress
with writing reprehensible
and clearly indefensible).
But if you write what you deplore,
it seems unlikely what’s in store
is you’ll seek publication for
a work which is declarative
that editing’s imperative
and must be taken to extremes;
a mishmash of pathetic memes
that burn your eyes like headlight beams
which blind a deer who stares in dread
at danger on the road ahead ...
But edited, it might converse,
and tell its story, kindly terse,
no longer needing to re-verse
because you’ve chosen to defer,
quite wisely, to an editor.
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