Hung Before I Am Heard
I
am gagged. Live on other people’s terms.
I
have no voice.
I
try to speak. They shut me up.
Be grateful, they say,
The homeless would jump at the opportunities
you have.
Be happy, they muse, be contented.
You have shelter.
But
a shelter that I am squeezed into.
I
feel imprisoned in it. I live in bondage.
I
am free but I live in chains.
Condemned
like a criminal, breathing behind the iron bars.
Kept
in a room where I can only sit. It is arduous to stand.
I
have become frail.
I
am battered. I am broken.
No
one wants to come to me.
I
have no voice.
Not
out of cowardice; but out of helplessness.
Life
seems meaningless. It is useless to fight.
They
take stock. Everyday separating the living from the dead.
The
living wish to die. The dead find solace in the peace which is death.
Even
this tunnel does not promise light.
Wallowing
in self-pity is a norm,
wrapped
in cloth of depression and pain.
Feelings
of disillusionment rip my soul apart
as
it holds on to the trenches of hope.
But
there seems to be no glimmer of hope.
Even
as the glimmer of light is struggling to seep in,
darkness
pushes hard.
When
is my freedom?
It
is long overdue.
No
matter what my face reflects, the struggle is real on the inside.
Many
have gone with the tides.
Life
has happened to some, but many are hanging on to the thin thread of hope.
The
question is when? How soon will it be?
Teardrops,
long sighs.
How I wish freedom was near. This struggle is
forlorn.
I
hope I survive. That my life will get better.
That
the light will permeate.
Believe In You!
I
feel the hurt, the rejection. It pierces through my skin.
It
rips my heart open. The blood of dejection gushes out.
The
pain cleaves my bone. Grief holds my soul captive.
The
pain brings me to the very cringe of my existence.
Indeed,
it is not fair, the way my life has been relegated,
the
way hope was taken away from me.
It’s
been quite a journey,
bearing
a burden larger than life, no one caring about me.
Not
the world, not anyone.
But
I keep pushing.
To
prove that my life isn’t a waste.
The
burden on my shoulders weighs heavily,
but
I will arise from the debris of rejection.
Because
tomorrow depends on my choices.
To
live or to die, to fail or to succeed.
Yes,
life kicks hard, but live I must.
This
rejection, this condemnation
is
the drive for purposeful living.
I’ll
succeed. I’ll rise above all relegation.
I
will swim in the ocean of relevance.
For
every door shut, I will open multiple doors.
My revenge for this hurt is success.
This pain will launch me into greatness.
I know it is hard. Some days I just want
to give up.
But giving up won’t take me to my desired
destination.
I need no escape. I just need to keep
pushing.
Rejection becomes my catalyst to success.
It shines the torch. It creates a pathway.
I lay aside the burden of relegation.
I embrace my greatness.
Adedolapo Tunde-Muraina was born in Lagos, Nigeria. She migrated to Ireland in June 2019 and currently lives in a Direct Provision Centre in Borrisokane. A selection of her poetry has previously been published in Vessel of Voices: An Anthology of New Tipperary Writing, edited by John W. Sexton. She is currently on a Scholarship with Dublin City University studying Psychology (through its University of Sanctuary Programmes).
Keep pushing, dear poet, and you will get to where you need to be. This is an honest and very strong poem.
ReplyDeleteWell done dolly and thank you for writing down our thoughts and feelings.
ReplyDeleteYour writing is so beautifully raw and your truth and strength shines through.
ReplyDeleteGreat poem Adedolapo, well done. Such touching words.
ReplyDeleteThanks Dolly, this is wonderful...
ReplyDeleteSo beautifully done, there is light at the end of the tunnel. I wish you more success
ReplyDeleteSo true and wonderful, great and multiple doors be opened unto you and us all Amen. Well done ma'am
ReplyDeleteYour poems are a true reflection of what we endure in DP and a reminder to remain strong because our own survival is more important. Thank you sister and God bless you.
ReplyDeleteBeautifully written poems and the transition is great. It gives hope to the hopeless. Courage, faith and big dreams always come to rescue when one believes.
ReplyDeleteI see a great poet already made...i salute your valour big sis.very well said, i am always proud of you.
ReplyDeleteWhat a poetic way of painting the picture of the pain each and everyone face in direct provision. Kudos to Ade
ReplyDeleteAdedolapo your concise and impactful words cut straight to my deepest emotions. Your poems deserve my praise. I can't help but shed tears. I won't stop pushing cos My freedom is near
ReplyDeleteWell done ma...more to your elbow... Love this
ReplyDeleteVery accurate
ReplyDeleteI am blown away by the power and strength of your writing. Congratulations and good luck with your studies.
ReplyDeleteLove it well done. Only who is going through this process can understand every single word you said 😔
ReplyDeleteOnly a person who has had experience of such emotions can express them so accurately and palpably. Thank you for your expressive enlightenment Adedolapo 🙏🏻 Your poetry deserves more exposure so that it can affect more people and keep the pressure for reform on. àlàáfíà 😘
ReplyDeleteGreat
ReplyDeleteWell spoken and well return. This piece paint a clear picture of what I have gone through for 3 full years. Well done Neighbour....very proud of you. And pls keep going, don't stop here.
ReplyDeleteReading this honest descriptive poetry, it brings you to an image of what a refugee would flee from, to hear that people are subjected to this in our State after their own very difficult journey is both disheartening that it is true and also encouraging that this poet can speak so clearly, hopefully getting her and others story told. Sharing to spread the word, and listening to understand the truth. You should be very proud of your poetry, thank you for sharing.
ReplyDeleteVery well written, you captured our cries in DP! Its a daily struggle to keep our spirits up.
ReplyDelete