When I Retire to Michigan
when I retire
to Michigan
when I’m 65
I want to return to
the audacious five year old
who I was
playing with abandon
creating without sensor
loving unabashedly
living in my swimsuit all day
with band aided knees from
bicycle crashes
and believing
in the endlessness
of time and energy
belonging
independent
beloved
my life before me
inside me
all around me
falling asleep
to the cricket song
through my open window
when I retire
to Michigan
when I’m 65
I want to return to
the audacious five year old
who I still am
One Day
one day
at the national gallery
I stared at
Jean-Baptiste-Camille Corot’s painting
so long and
so ardently
that I was inside it
standing at the water’s edge
I could feel the breeze
watch the river flowing by
and hear the quiet murmurings
of the few people nearby
time
was suspended
was I there
a moment
or an hour
or a day
I’ll never know
but I’ll never forget
falling into
Ville-D’avray
that day
at the National Gallery
once fully experienced
a painting
never leaves you
Dinner Tonight
I had dinner tonight
with my new friend,
Adeline
I made a salmon burger
to tempt her out
from her hiding spot
under my bed
and she hopped
onto my lap
and shared a small morsel
of salmon
from my blue plate
and while I read
Mary Oliver
we shared a taste of
togetherness
A Very Full Day, A Very Full Heart
woke after an
odd dream about cats
and names
lovely awakening
writing while the sun rose
to greet me
a poignant church service
with our new pastor
whom I already love
then a zoom call
with poets from
around the world
lovely to
meet them virtually
after four years together
as the call ended
my phone alarm reminded me
of an appointment
driving to the shelter
my heart kept repeating her name
Adeline
I'd fallen in love
with just one picture
overnight
we lay on the floor
in your visiting booth
saying hello
when you crawled
in my lap and purred
I was a goner
bringing you home
was the easiest decision
of a lifetime
as you explored the house
and got settled in
I painted
it is the
largest canvas
I've ever tackled
it's for a friend
and so different
for me
but I loved it
and that lives poured out
and onto the canvas
and when I stood back
and soaked it all in
my heart leapt
and then
I got to spend the evening
connecting with my new friend
when you head butt
me for snuggles
or jump on my lap
the tiny shards of my heart
that were shattered when
my last lives both passed
knit themselves back
together
stronger this time
a few years were shed
in the process of understanding
but fresh love heals
for if grief is love
deep love
with nowhere to go
then aren't I
the lucky one
to have a new love
all this remaining love
with have a vessel in you
and my heart mends itself
what a very full day
of faith and creation
of friendship and new family
of letting go of pain
and risking one's heart
to love again
To Brave New Love
opening my heart
to new love
touches the bruise of grief
yet to be able
to feel new love again
I must be brave
it’s hard
and tempting to stay
in my shell
but
what’s the point
of that
alone
versus the possibility of love
I choose love
Even-time
the day floated by
unassuming
diaphanous
I woke to write by candlelight
in the near-dawn gentle light
coffee easing the transition
as light gradually
woke the day, and me
a plan took form
paint
the day awake
eat something to fill the void
return to the shelter
to confirm what my heart already knew
of new love
and then float
on the wings of words
as poetry came into being
connecting with
friends and family
as the day unfolds
I blinked and it went
from AM to PM
with the plan unfurling with ease
Miles Davis on the Bose
welcomes me into even-time
as day turns over to night
Opening My Heart
opening my heart
to the newness of you
reassembling
the pieces of my life
after all the many losses
I have such love to give
I have such deep love
to receive, to feel
I know you are there
ready, too
to feel my love
my prayer for today
my hope
is that as I’m waking to this new day
and my heart is opening to you
somewhere
you are opening
to me, too
Jennifer Gurney lives in Colorado where she teaches, paints, writes and hikes. Her poetry is widely published, two of her poems have won international contests and one was turned into a choral piece. One of her poems was recently long listed for the Elizabeth Royal Patton Poetry Prize. Jennifer has nine books of poetry, My Eyes Adjusting (2024), Liquid Sky (2025), Love’s Echolocation (2025), Light Matters More (2025), Unheard Verses (2025), Life Extends Outward (2025), The Curiosity of Roadside Attractions (2025), Your Voice Still In My Ear (forthcoming) and Indelible Ink (forthcoming). Her poetry manuscript, We Are Never Ready: A Collection of Grief Poems, made Honorable Mention for the 2025 Concrete Wolf Louis Award. Another manuscript, Curvature of Life, was selected as a semi-finalist in the Tenth Gate Prize 2025 from The Word Works. Also, in just three years, more than 2,300 of Jennifer’s poems have been published. Her poetry crosses a wide range of form, subject and style with a consistent voice that is honest and authentic, conveying all that is on her heart.
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